It’s possible to make peace with your demons.

They are not actually demons at all, but only the imprints of a scared, hurt, and lonely inner child who needs to be seen, heard, comforted, loved, and cared for by the adult you’ve now become.

When you were a little child, things happened that you didn’t understand and could not control.  You were scared, hurt, humiliated, infuriated, isolated, ignored, abandoned, bullied, abused, mislead, neglected, confused, or silenced.  And there was nothing you could do about it.  Then.

Now as an adult, you’re just going along your way, when something triggers a memory of that child’s experiences and those feelings flood back.  Next thing you know, you’re binging on junk food, frantically busy, numbing out in front of the TV, or drinking excessive alcohol.  Anything to avoid reliving those emotions and the lack of control that accompanies them, plummeting you into a pit.

Except, now that you are an adult, everything is different for you.  You have knowledge and resources that little child didn’t have.  You have freedom and power.  You can see the big picture and understand what is going on.  You can assess the problem, develop a plan, take action, and change course if necessary.  You are capable, resourceful, and self-aware.

In fact, you have everything you need to look down with compassion at that little orphaned version of yourself tugging at your pant leg, asking you if everything is going to be okay.  You can sweep your younger self up into your lap and hug them tight.  You can explain that you have got this situation handled, you are going to protect them and care for them and keep them safe.  You can comfort and calm them and let them know that there’s an adult in the house now, prepared to take life’s challenges in stride, coping with whatever comes up.  All is well, little one.  I’m taking care of everything.  I’m taking care of you.

 

If you need extra assistance comforting and healing your inner orphan, I recommend Inner Bonding and Feminine Power from Evolving Wisdom.  Both have step-by-step processes for working through the demons left by our childhood traumas.  Inner Bonding is gender neutral, while Feminine Power provides many additional resources specific to empowering women.